The Searchlight of Insight

Teamwork: getting dressed for church

Four Years Old Today

Four years ago to the minute, Tess was in the hospital as were the triplets. I was at home. I had just posted the first pics of them in the NICU, while polishing off a part bottle of wine - or maybe all of it, can't remember - and half a block of cheddar cheese. As I worked at the computer I listened to Dido's songs "Life For Rent" and "White Flag" and "Here With Me" over and over and over, thinking that Lita must have thought I was crazy. (Ironic, because that was the start of a season when I waved a white flag to the Lord.) It was a rough night. As I went to bed, I recall praying that the triplets would live. My words fell on silence. There was no experience of grace from God, but I knew He was there, and I knew He knew that I knew He was there... odd, but just one of those things. Call it "expectant silence." Four years later as we held the triplets' birthday party on the playground, my mind continued to emerge out of the long fog of four years, bewildered at where the triplets have come from, what they have accomplished, the incredible story of their survival and progress. The crowd sang each one of them "Happy Birthday." as each one took a turn blowing out the candle. During each song I choked up... unable to make my way through the moment. Just too overwhelming. On a lighter note you probably are all wondering, "what about the cake?" The cake... something very different: in keeping with the spiritual season that I find myself in these days, I made a cake of a Christian monastery atop of a mountain. Simple. Symbolic. Spiritual. Do you believe me?

small world christmas plays

Tess wrote about Jasper in his class play. No doubt he was the most handsome in his class with his blue eyes matching blue sheppard's outfit. Below are some pictures from this week's Small World Christian Kindergarten plays for Jasper's class and Sela and Carys' class.

Above left: JJ during his play reciting his lines. After the play each child gave their parents a gift. Above right: JJ receives the gift from his teacher. At left JJ posing alobe with his sheep and next JJ poses with his SWCK crushes, Asha and Shae. Below are the girls in their Christmas play...

Blatant Disregard?

As I am sure everyone has gathered from MoZiLLa's and Tess' posts of the last few months, the triplets are coming off their naps. Most of the time they don't nap unless very, very tired. During the no-naptimes there are some priceless moments, such as the one Sela and I had on Saturday. The scene: Either Tess or myself have been in the triplets' bedroom several dozen times, instructing the kids with stern tones to lie down and go to sleep. The last time I went in caused the kids to finally go to sleep thanks to Sela. Once again I walked in to say sternly:

"Okay everyone, please lie down and go to sleep. Sela, that means you, too. Please lie down."

From Sela: silence and no response as she kneeled in her bed.

"Sela, I asked you to lie down. Are you going to lie down or are you going to disobey me?"

Sheepishly from Sela: "I am going to disobey you."

From Dad: silence as I contrasted her honesty and disobedience.

To make a long story short, turns out Sela didn't want to lie down because she had just filled her knickers... and I am not talking about a wee wee here. I asked her to stand up, she obeyed and voila the mystery was revealed. Sela was disgraced and started to cry. (This is what would put her to sleep once back in bed... a good cry.) Into a cold shower for a cleaning, put the soiled knickers into the laundry ~ the usual routine. Eventually I calmed her down while explaining to her it's okay to get out of bed to go to the bathroom. (Maybe that was the easy way out, too, for all I know she might think that's too much work.) We cuddled and made-up, and the ringleader of no-naptime went to sleep as did Jasper and Carys. Tess and I managed to squeeze in another episode of Gray's Anatomy.

Jasper the Gentleman

At his school, SWCK, Jasper is turning out to do quite the little gentleman, or flat out flirt. Here JJ is pictured dancing with a classmate, who he also knows from Union Church. Isn't the smugness on his face just a little embarassing? I don't want to sound like a gloating parent - maybe too late for that - but the whole thing is just a little bit ridiculous. Mothers who bump into Tess with Jasper at parties, or elsewhere around town, often say to her, "Oh, YOUR Jasper's mother! My daughter is in JJ's class and always talks about him!" Lucky guy. I don't remember the girls talking about me in that fashion. In order for any of these little romances to progress Jasper is first in need of figuring out his sex... which changes daily. Girl... boy... girl with a willy... boy with a willy. But that's not what we tell him. No, the path to romance is through eating your vegetables. (Ah, that's where I went wrong.) Down the hatch, JJ, your dance cards filling up!

The Dora Cake

At long last here is the latest birthday cake: The Dora Cake. Sorry folks, there is no video of this one being made. That is a major production that doubles the time of making the cake and is time consuming putting together. I do have lots of video to share with you that I hope to post in the next 4 - 6 weeks but not of the cake making.

Unfortunately, I was unable to find any chocolate icing, so Dora looks like her hair has been lightened by Tony Guy or hours and hours of mountain climbing in the sun. (Or whatever Dora does.) My account of the triplets birthday can be found here, and Tess' account of the triplets birthday can be found here. It truly was a very special and gorgeous day. To see more pictures of that day go to Tess blog here.

This past week I was in Korea for 2 - 3 days and am now back in Hong Kong. I am here for about ten days before heading off to India for three days. The travel is picking up. That's all there is for now... please be sure to go see the other pictures on Tess' blog.

Three Years Old Today...

The triplets are three years old today... at this exact moment, around 10:40 - 10:44 AM. Meanwhile, I am probably winner for World’s Worst Dad. I am completely and totally ill-prepared for their birthday, to the point that yesterday Tess agreed to postpone their birthday party for a week. A little background... right now Hong Kong is coming to the end of Chinese New Year, meaning that offices and roads are still relatively deserted. The pollution, weather and haze of the last few days has been terrible, but this morning we woke-up to a gorgeous day identical to the one I woke-up to three years ago. Unfortunately at work I/we have many balls in the air, which prevented me from being fully released from work during the five day Chinese New Year holiday. Instead Tess & I were managing the kids (who were going through a 6 AM wake-up cycle… urgh) and my Blackberry was smoking hot to keep me on top of a variety of work projects. Needless to say, I am very, very tired… last night when I got home from work I even referred to the lovely and talented Odila as “Dora the Explorer.” The conversation went like this…

Charles: “How is Dora, did you talk to her today?”

Tess: “I beg your pardon?”

Charles: “You know, Dora the Explorer!”

Tess: “Did I talk to Dora, who is Dora?”

Charles (sheepishly): “Uh, I meant Odila.”

Last night I went to bed at 8:45 PM, and then woke-up at 2:30 AM unable to get back to sleep. I finally got back to sleep at 5:00 AM but was up again at 6:30 for an early morning meeting. Fortunately, the ever clever and committed Lita will make a birthday cake today for the triplets. They are really too young to understand birthdays as it relates to themselves, but they do love the concept. The new plan is to have a birthday party next Saturday. The location will be a nearby beach that I have always wanted to visit. I promised Tess I’ll scout out the beach this weekend with Sebastian. With mild colds, coughs and people still away for CNY, it’s easy to delay a birthday party. Tess assures me we are sufficiently loaded up on presents. Next Friday evening Sebastian and I will make an Odila cake… uh, I mean a Dora cake,  so I’ll probably get one pass at “get out of being world’s worst dad” just once. But I still feel guilty. Maybe Krispy Kreme’s will work... not for me, for them!

Above picture was taken right before Sebastian and Jasper headed out to school, the last day of school before the CNY holiday. You'll see they are dressed in festive CNY outfits.

Colts take Bears, Jasper starts school, sniff

Considering I pay attention to American football once a year for only a few days, I shouldn't be too worried about the Colts' Superbowl win and frankly, I'm not. My personal preference would have been a Bears' victory since I love Chicago for a host of reasons. First, several years ago a former colleague and I (after a fabulous dinner with other colleagues) played a gorgeous grand piano in The Ballroom of the original Hilton until the wee hours of the morning. Eventually security kicked us out. Second, being a Kellogg graduate, I favour the Bears. (Jasper, at left, plays with a football in November 2005.)

To be honest, when I was younger I loved football so much I had to ignore the sport. I kid you not. Whenever I watched a football game - live or on TV - I dreamt about football for weeks and often wanted to play on the high school team. Thanks to the regular supply of football-related spinal injuries floating through Toronto hospitals, that dream never came to fruition.

Today as the Superbowl roared on, some buds of mine watched the game at a friend's flat. The rest of us were at work. I sent them text messages like "GO BEARS" while the game was still close. I have to say, though, Kelvin Hayden certainly earned his paycheck after a 56 yard interception that returned a touchdown, putting the Colts way out in front! Talk about buying insurance ... the Bears never recovered. I receded from sending text messages after that but cast a watchful eye to the online coverage.

Saturday evening Tess returned from her US business trip with a funny story about the days leading up to the Superbowl. While she was in transit in Chicago lots of people were naturally flying from Chicago to Indianapolis for The Game. Whenever the attendants announced an Indianapolis-bound flight they'd end off with, "and on this flight to Indianapolis passengers will be given a free box of tissue because after Sunday, you'll need it." Tess' return was met with much cheerleading, with the kids handing out an ample supply of hugs, kisses and we missed you's! (Left, the kids enjoy a video together after welcoming Tess home.)

Meanwhile, Team Caldwell had a day of firsts, too... (the Superbowl was a game of firsts... the first rainy Super Bowl - and one of the messiest with lots of wet and mud - the first time an opening kickoff was run back for a touchdown, the first time the Colts won a Superbowl title since the 1970 season) ... today our touchdown was Jasper's first day of school. The crowds cheered, the crowds cried, while Jasper confidently yet haphazardly waltzed his was into education endzone with Sebastian playing defence. (Left, Sebastian & Jasper pose together in their SWCK smocks before leaving for school.)

As the morning's events unfolded I had several flashbacks, thinking of the ground we'd taken in the past three years with the triplets' upcoming Feb 23rd birthday. Technically, Small World Christian Kindergarten's entry gate is three years old. Jasper is coming in just ahead of the line. The girls are clipping his heals with a March 1 start date.

I also had a flash forward as I realised this was the start of Jasper's formal education. Perhaps some day twenty years down the road - maybe around another momentous education event such as graduation - I'll look back on this day to remember when JJ first began school. I'll remember that it was a gorgeous sunny and clear day in Hong Kong with hardly any pollution. A light breeze tickled the flag flying atop The Governor's House (now the Chief Executive's home). As we drove to Small World we passed Union Church to see our new pastor's wife, Holly, watching the world go by. We waved and smiled. Many changes for many people, not just for Jasper. As so many of us enter a new season in our lives we can't help but feel the sense of anticipation, excitement and accomplishment of what's next, just like the Colts and Jasper probably feel today.

First day of 2007

I was right, last night was a bit tough. I was asleep by about 11 pm. Tess lay next to me watching "Love Actually." At midnight the neighbourhood exploded in cheers that lasted at least an hour. Throughout the night Sela woke-up crying every 30 - 60 minutes. Tess took the 11 pm to 3 AM watch. I took the 3:30 to 7 AM watch. Finally at 7:15 I got the kids up and made French Toast while they watched Dora the Explorer.

Sela has been in a nasty mood all morning. She still has a fever, too. In the middle of my cleaning up and doing some chores I heard screaming and exclamations emanating from the playroom. I walked in to find Sela standing with her legs apart as if she had something stuck up her rear. Funny that, she did... I could see from behind a little sack of sh*t bulging through her pyjamas.

"Daddy, I had to do a poopers!" Sela screamed.

"Well Sela, you don't have to wait for me. You can always go to the toilet on your own!" I explained. (We have a little stool - no pun intended - that makes it easy for the kids to get on and off the toilet.)

The stinky mess is now cleaned up and the girls changed. Jasper was on, off, on, off, on, off blah blah the toilet but alas, finally did his business. Tess and I have full blown colds, as does Sela, and Sebastian is now starting to heat-up. You know you're a parent with your hands full when you can't wait for naptime and bedtime... and it's still only 9:39 AM!

Christmas Cantata

Saturday night Tess and I took the kids for dinner at Dan Ryan’s and then for a walk through Hong Kong Park and Central to see the various Christmas decorations adorning Hong Kong. Then today Union Church held its Christmas Cantata. That was quite amazing and the choir clearly worked long and hard to create that production. The last song, however, they were joined by the kids choir… and some young kids… starting at two years old! Funny story there… as the triplets walked in with the other children, Jasper saw me. Reportedly he’d just had a very minor accident in his pants. JJ didn't think it was minor. At the top of his lungs he informed me – and the rest of the congregation – at least four or five times… “Daddy, I’m WET!” Too bad I didn't get that on video… it was truly hilarious. But the tour of Hong Kong Christmas decorations and the last song of the Christmas Cantata can be found below. Enjoy.